Race is not real, but has a real force

This link will lead you to a WUNC radio broadcast of John Jackson, the author of "Real Black: Adventures in Racial Sincerity".

It makes me think that race is like Santa Clause. Completely made up and imaginary yet everywhere you look. It makes my head hurt but also frees my heart. No matter how horribly race has been used in the past, it is still fake and does not have to have power over me or my mothering of Jonathan. It can effect it but has no right to control it.

My son has brown skin but his favorite color is green. My son's hair is brown but we both have curly, dry hair. My son dances but loves John Cash as much as Ray Charles. I can't imagine having different dreams for my son if he looked any different. I would still want him to have a heart after God and a joy for life.

G

I wish I was this type of wife

From Beloved by Toni Morrison:
" She is a friend of my mind. She gather me, man. The pieces I am, she gather them and give them back to me in all the right order. It's good, you know, when you got a women who is a friend of your mind."

What a beautiful ending (almost) to an amazing book.

Beloved is like a Salvador painting. Beautiful and horrifying in the same glimpse. Harsh, especially as a white women, but so full of mercy and compassion that it has some to spare and drips off the pages to cleanse.

Read,
G

Beloved by Toni Morrison

After a recent conversation with my "Mocha Mom" friends, I am reading Toni Morrison's book "Beloved". I have enjoyed it much more then I expected I would after reading some of the reviews. Besides the obvious repulsion at what a person, a country, a race could do during slavery, it had touched me in many other ways. I am glad I am reading this as a mother. I do not think it could have touched me so if I was not. I am also glad I can read it through the eyes of my african american son. It frightens me to consider what he will have to go through because of the color of his skin and the color of ours. It makes me cling much more to the beautiful miracle of his birth and adoption into our family.

G

Jonathan's Two Year Check Up

Jonathan went to Dr Clark today for his 2 year check up. He did great. Didn't even flinch with his flu shot. He weighed in at 34 pounds 3 ounces, which is 95%. His height is 35 and 3/4 inches, which is 85%. His head circumference is 49 cm.

He is health and doing great!

G

Restlessness and discontent are vital things

What an interesting article. I relate very much to her ideas, however I am a long way from embracing them as she has. It is nice however to see these, almost painful feelings of restlessness put into words. I for the most part am not an emotional person, but I can relate to much of what she is saying.

I love the lyrics to the spiritual "It is well worth my soul". The author penned this song after the tragic loss of his family. Yet I can relate to the pain for no reason, just from some restlessness inside of myself. I sometimes think it is because I have never really had to feel pain that I conjure it up. This is a big blind spot in my life.

Please out!
G

I won the huge genetic lottery and I get joy every day.

I like the quote. I feel bad for Penn Jullette that he doesn't " travel in circles where people say..." yet he knows enough about what they say and who they are that he can comment on it. Seems very odd to me. My guess is that he gets these impressions from movies, tv evangelists, or other non genuine sources. I do believe in God and I do believe in my own fallibility. This means I too am always eager to learn, examine my beliefs along side the beliefs of others and I know for sure there is a lot of truth outside myself.

That said, I love the quote "I won the huge genetic lottery and I get joy every day. " I too feel so blessed by my family. The real joy is that in my familyt there is no genetics involved. One day we were visiting my parents at the beach. I was out on the porch with my step-father, Jon, and my two wonderful sons Matthew and Jonathan. My husband later pointed out that amongst the four of us there was no common blood. Matthew is my husbands son from a previous marriage and we adopted Jonathan in 2003. Yet we had all won the lottery when it came to family. We were taking advantage of the joy that comes from the unconditional love and long term commitment families provide.

Joy out!
G

Wrongly Attributed Bill Gates Quote

I often site Bill Gate's supposed quote "No one will need more than 637 kb of memory for a personal computer" to give me courage to make technical decisions, even if there is a potential for being wrong. My logic was that if Bill Gates can get away with it, I can.

My guess there are many great men who took risks that did not pay off. Or that were wrong but in a position to admit it and more on. Taking risks can be tough for me, so I will need to search out a new piece of courage in the form of a quote.

It's a beautiful day. Go out and play!
G

Good-bye Miss Ginny Bubnis

I did a google search today to see if there was any trace of my maiden name. Nope. Gone. I haven't decided yet if that is a good thing or bad. (I'm leaning towards Good).

Interesting how your life is described on the web. Mine (as Ms Ghezzo) is filled with VisualAge Smalltalk and book reviews on baby items. Maybe it is time to get a real life?!?

Actually I love my life. I have a great job working on emerging standards, I have a super family of bright, talented people, I am very involved in my church, neighborhood and community. It is such a good life that a google search will never do it justice.

Go!!
G

Linus Torvalds

In my previous post I randomly referenced Linus Torvalds so I decided to read up a bit on him. What a humbling read! He is basically my age and nearly a household name. Most definitely an industry name by anyones standard.

I too was playing with Commodore Vic-20s and Sinclairs back in the '80s. Somehow my intelligence, education and circle of friends though did not lead me in the same direction as Linux. One very impressive items is that he is not only technical but also a great manager. Wow, now I really feal bad.

Have fun!
G

The difference between men and women

I have recently been interviewing for a few positions in my area. One very interesting "trend" (or maybe not a trend but hey) is that very smart, accomplished college women will reference their boyfriends as they talk about their experience. It doesn't bother me, however I would council them to just take credit for what you are doing even if it is something your boyfriend got you interested in. Everyone is recruited by someone. I bet even Linus traveled had someone get him into operating systems. I shake off these references to boyfriends but I wonder what other interviewers think when they hear that.

I will not have to watch how often I qualify my beliefs or knowledge by referencing my husband or anyone else.

Have fun!
G

Does this seem right to you?

"If you are going to sell your soul to the devil, it might as well go to the highest bidder."
Ginny Ghezzo, November 3, 2005

My nightmare

Some people have nightmares about showing up at school naked. I fear being Michael Brown. The Bush administration has make me completely phobic about being incompetent. I find it difficult to work with people who are not prepared, but even worse is when I find myself "phoning it in".
I am constantly trying to figure out what I am good at and where i need to improve. However, I know I have blind spots and a gulf between what i want to be and what I really am. In the bible, the Book of Romans talks about clay pots. I am fine being a clay pot, but I have to know it so I can quit trying to live up to my potential.

On that cheery note ...
G

Tears from my little tropper

The honeymoon phase is over already. Jonathan would not let Alan go as he tried to drop him off at daycare today. When they finally separated there were many tears.
Jonathan has been a little more dramatic lately. The tears are a lot more passionate then in the past. This started even before day care. Maybe someone told Jonathan he would be 2 this month.

Any advice?
G

So Proud of my big boy

Jonathan started day school today. He will be going to First Presbyterian Day School in downtown durham. The word from his daddy is that Jonathan is enjoying it and has made friends with a little blond girl.
This experience has been tougher on Alan so far then Jonathan. Alan will be going back to work on December 5th. We are using November as a transition from the good life to the life of dual careers.

What an adventure!
G