The complicated language of adoption

TL;DR - If you see an adopted family, don't stare. If you know an adopted family, feel comfortable to ask questions.

I am inspired by Simone Biles. Her athleticism is a amazing. But her laugh makes me smile ever time. If you have not seen it, watch this clip and try not to smile when she says ".... so I am the only one that does it." link

You have all heard her family story at this point and have seen her lovely parents cheering her on from Rio. You have probably also heard Al Trautwig unfortunately comments\tweets on adoption. As a birth mom and adopted mom (as well as a step mom for good measure), I want to take this opportunity to say :

1. I did nothing heroic adopting my son. We are not saints, we just wanted a kid.
2. I did nothing heroic placing my daughter for adoption. Abortion was never an option in my mind. I had the support to raiser her but I also knew I want to get back to school 
3. My son struggles with being adopted in full view of the world. If it was him, he would prefer NBC focus on the rest of his story and not the adoption. 
4. My daughter and her husband have found room for my family and her birth father's family while not taking anything away from their parents. I hope some day we can show the same love to Shauntell and her family.

Adoptions are complicated. We do not have good language to talk about them. While they lend themselves to simple stories, they rarely are. 

And now some music  from Sara Bareilles "Love Song"